This is a touchy subject in my family. Not my immediate family, but my extended family. There is one person that I am having difficulty dealing with. She is like saccharine to my face, but behind my back she undermines me at every opportunity.
I am not worried if she reads this. I doubt she’d see herself in it anyway. I know I am not totally innocent, because when I am pushed I push back.
I never claimed to be nice. Sometimes I do forget doing things. I have an excuse, between depression and brain fog and perhaps even my medications my memory is shot.
I can’t always remember if I’ve just taken my medication when I am holding the bottle in my hand. But I will own up to things as my memory returns. Sometimes even if it hasn’t if it rings true.
I don’t lie on purpose. In fact I am a terrible liar. This person is good at it. She upsets others over stupid stuff. Like a gluten-free recipe. Now, we’ll see if the family reads my blog.
Why would you get upset over someone suggesting a recipe everyone can eat? If you are as caring and loving as you pretend to be you would try it. You would not make jokes about adding a tablespoon of flour to a recipe. This is serious stuff.
Where is your compassion? You like people to think you have it, shouldn’t you pretend to have it?
So how do I deal with it? Apparently, direct confrontation gets my phone number blocked, disagreement gets me unfriended on Facebook. Should I confront her in front of everyone? Perhaps my husband should weigh in here.
I would cut her out of my life if I could. She is not vital to my existence. Except that family connection. What would you do?
This is not conducive to my healing and peace of mind. Especially, hearing about the fallout first thing in the morning, so my racing thoughts can play it over and over.
Love. Peace and Light!
Rita
My Crazy Life 
I would love fron afar. If she is not contributing to your growth, peace and happiness, there is no need. You can love from afar without being involved with her.
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Gosh, I think you have an ignorant green eyed monster in your midst. I know how a “spoonful of flour” can affect someone. My friend is a sufferer and I’ve seen the consequences first hand. When ever she comes to me for a meal, we all eat gluten free. It’s no big deal and we don’t make it a big deal. She knows I’m allergic to to tomatoes and likewise, would no way serve me something containing them. The difference here is that she is my friend and not a so called, family member. You can choose your friends…….
So how do you deal with it? Well you’ve said she will block your phone number and unfriend you on Facebook, she sounds like a 12 year old! It’s all about the attention. She craves it, negative or otherwise. This in return has a negative impact on both you and your husband’s lives and that is what she is striving for. Perhaps some counselling could help her sort out her negativities.
You know, in life we don’t have to be “friends” with anyone that we do not wish to and in this instance, for your own self preservation, I’d walk away. Keeping the connection because is she is “family” should make no difference. She obviously isn’t interested in the connection, if she acts this way. I treat and respect people accordingly and in this case, she deserves neither your time or effort. Walk away and don’t feel guilty. You don’t need the burden.
Love and light ❤️
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I think her problem is that she can’t control me and so controls what she can. I’ll just bring my own food. It really helps to write out my feelings in my blogs to gain perspective. Thank you for your support.
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